{"id":132513,"date":"2024-10-10T16:43:20","date_gmt":"2024-10-10T20:43:20","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/?p=132513"},"modified":"2024-10-11T00:47:50","modified_gmt":"2024-10-11T04:47:50","slug":"expanding-beyond-our-old-self-view","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/2024\/10\/10\/expanding-beyond-our-old-self-view\/","title":{"rendered":"Expanding Beyond Our Old Self-View"},"content":{"rendered":"<h4 class=\"wp-block-heading\">By Leo Babauta<\/h4>\n<p>When we\u2019re looking to grow, what we\u2019re really trying to do is step into a new, expanded view of ourselves.<\/p>\n<p>For example, if you want to be more mindful, or live more simply, or be more compassionate with yourself or others, or be more disciplined about your meaningful work \u2026 these are all new versions of you. They\u2019re expanded beyond your old way of seeing yourself.<\/p>\n<p>We\u2019re constantly trying to expand beyond an old identity: when we try something new, or try to grow in our relationships, or try to quit a bad habit \u2026 what we\u2019re really doing is trying to shed our old self-view.<\/p>\n<p>Unfortunately, the old self-view has a gravity to it, that tries to constantly pull us back into the old way.<\/p>\n<p>So in some of the examples above, you might see:<\/p>\n<ul class=\"wp-block-list\">\n<li><strong>Be more mindful<\/strong> \u2014 the old way of going through your life mindlessly pulls you back in by having you get pulled into distractions, habitual patterns, etc.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Living simply<\/strong> \u2014\u00a0the old way of living a cluttered life tries to keep you there by having fear stop you from decluttering, or by having fear try to have you shop on impulse.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Be more disciplined<\/strong> \u2014 your old procrastinator self will put up resistance to that discipline, and have you want to avoid anything difficult or overwhelming.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Try something new<\/strong> \u2014 your old comfortable self will throw up lots of resistance and thoughts to have you put off trying the new thing and feeling bad or awkward at it.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Quit a bad habit<\/strong> \u2014 your old self will tell you, \u201cJust this once won\u2019t hurt\u201d or \u201cWhy are you making yourself suffer\u201d or \u201cYou deserve this reward\u201d so that you stay in the comfort of the bad habit.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>So the old identity tries to keep us in what we know. How do we expand beyond it?<\/p>\n<p>Here\u2019s what I\u2019ve found.<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">1: Set the intention of an expanded self<\/h3>\n<p>Let\u2019s imagine that you weren\u2019t limited by your old identity \u2014 who do you want to be? What would you like to do that feels a bit impossible? It can be something small\u00a0(\u201cI want to wake up a little earlier\u201d),\u00a0or it can be a massive shift for you (\u201cI want to put my creative work out into the world in a bold way\u201d).<\/p>\n<p>Set this intention. Get clear on why this matters to you.<\/p>\n<p>Then commit yourself to the actions that this expanded self would take.<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">2: Practice the actions and being<\/h3>\n<p>The shift in your self-view will come as you take actions that are outside of the old limited self-view. If your old identity is that you are an introvert, but now you\u2019re talking to strangers every day \u2026 the old identity can\u2019t survive.<\/p>\n<p>So commit to taking the actions every day \u2014 or at least, most days, because it\u2019s OK to give yourself breaks. The practice the expanded self-view by taking those actions as much as possible.<\/p>\n<p>It will likely be hard, because you\u2019ll be pulled back by your old identity (see next section) \u2026 but practice doing them anyway!<\/p>\n<p>And as you do the actions, practice the expanded way of being as an inner state. For example, maybe you want to be more joyful as you do your work \u2014\u00a0then practice that joyfulness!<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">3: Notice when &amp; how you\u2019re getting pulled back<\/h3>\n<p>The old identity will try to pull you back every time you step outside of how you\u2019ve always known yourself. If you want to speak in public, each time you sign up to do a talk, your mind will give you a bunch of reasons why you should cancel.<\/p>\n<p>This is fear in action. It\u2019s a bodily sensation of fear, resistance, dread, overwhelm. It\u2019s also a series of thoughts \u2014 rationalizations (\u201cIt\u2019s OK to skip it this once\u201d) and mental gymnastics (\u201cLife is too short to put yourself through this\u201d).<\/p>\n<p>Just notice all of this. Take notes! Get curious.<\/p>\n<h3 class=\"wp-block-heading\">4: Give yourself compassion, but keep practicing<\/h3>\n<p>When you notice all of this, it\u2019s simply fear in action. Just give your fear a bit of compassion. Breathe. Be understanding and loving.<\/p>\n<p>Then take a small action, if you can. Just a tiny bit. Even that will create an opening for a new way of seeing yourself.<\/p>\n<p>The post <a href=\"https:\/\/zenhabits.net\/self-view\/\">Expanding Beyond Our Old Self-View<\/a> appeared first on <a href=\"https:\/\/zenhabits.net\">zen habits<\/a>.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>By Leo Babauta When we\u2019re looking to grow, what we\u2019re really trying to do is step into a new, expanded [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":131165,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[177],"tags":[180],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/132513"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=132513"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/132513\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":132514,"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/132513\/revisions\/132514"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/131165"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=132513"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=132513"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/yorbestlife.com\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=132513"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}