Walking Together

I have a friend who I know well enough to know.  She once told me a story about one of her childhood friends who lived down the block.  They would play until it was time to come in.  That typically means that when the street lights come on, your butt better be home.  Well as the story goes, these girls were more like sisters.  And neither wanted the other to walk alone.  So as they anticipated that streetlight signaling the end of playtime, they would make preparations to walk each other home.  That story always acted as a life lesson for me.  It reminds me that some things just feel better when they’re shared with a friend. From doing the hard work of saying good-bye to a loved one to celebrating a new milestone or even a new perspective.  And let’s not forget that some burdens are just a little easier to bear when shared.

Walking Together sister circle is a safe, comfortable place to do the tedious and sometimes lonesome work of personal growth as we individually journey from place to place, and stage to stage.

It has been said that some love others to the level that they love themselves.  I’d like to take that thought further to say that we can’t expect to know how to love deeply, offer grace and forgiveness empathetically, establish boundaries with commitment, etc if we don’t first master the critical skills around  how we deal with and how we love ourselves.

Each of the 5 steps in the PRACTICE are designed to help reconstruct the way you approach things today.  Today’s thoughts and behaviors  are hard wired into your psyche.  Your inner strength has the power and desire to go in a different direction.  But a different direction requires new and different information.  In order to expect to build a brand new world, dream a new dream, or slay a new giant you’ll have to reconstruct the unconscious networks within that guide our thoughts and behaviors robotically.  The PRACTICE is designed to remap neuro pathways for the right self-talk, self-awareness, self-regulation, and self-love.

The conscious layer of thoughts and behaviors is super easy to navigate for you. The assumption here is that you have that part figured out. You’re not a train wreck. No. no no. You’re ready to soar to the next new exciting place. These exercises will empower you to tap into your best self and live your best life.

Each of the 5 steps are to be repeated in 7 cycles of 10 days each (2 work weeks….I don’t do anything on the weekends).

1. Say:  Say nice things to yourself from your heart.  Say what you need to hear.  Start the phrase with “I am”.  Explain why you have decided to use this “I am” statement.  Jot down the phrase in your journal along with a few words on why it was meaningful.
2. Do:  Do a nice thing for yourself from your heart.  Choose what will make you feel good and feel special.  Make a note in your journal why this thing feels so good today.
3. Learn:  Fill your thoughts with new information about something of interest to you.  Select from blogs, videos, books, and other resources.  Plan time to eat until you’re full.  This means you should set aside time to really take it in. Don’t cheat yourself with a quick read.  Sit with it.  Mediate.  What does it say to you?  What is used my Stop task for 20-30 consecutive days (almost as its own challenge).  Most often I chose my Stop task from one of the new things I discovered during the Learn task.
4. Start:  My favorite step in the challenge is the Start task because it’s all about doing something new.  Given the power of steps 1-4, I hope you are eager to tackle something new.  An example of something new might be as simple as committing to send an uplifting text once a day or a commitment to start stretching for 10 minutes before each workout.  Make a note in your journal and smile ‘cause it’s gonna feel great!  The Start task is also one that I’ve kept the same for 20-30 days.  I do not have a different Start task each day of the challenge.

Journaling is a tried and true way to record your thoughts.  It’s wonderful to get thoughts out of your head (allowing room for creativity and  just plain enjoyment). It’s also cool to look back to see what headspace you were in X years ago and how dreams and desires have manifested.  There are lots of options to capture your thoughts:

1. Voice memo.  Recording app on your iPhone or Android
2. Notes.  Note taking app on your iPhone.  I don’t know what it’s called on Android
3. Paper.  Old school, but still effective

Video chat.  Private space can be created on many of the video chat tools; FB live, TikTok, Insta, Marco, etc.

Walking together with my sisters has brought me “joy inside my tears.”

I know that just being in the same space with the warmth and love of people whose light is shining brightly gives me the strength to embrace the journey and to learn to enjoy it.

Let’s walk together through this Lovers Challenge to put yourself first.  The challenge doesn’t in any way take away from the people you love and are charged to care for.  Au contraire.  I can attest that your reservoir of love and support that you have available to shower on others will be vast. Others will absolutely benefit from your practice of self-care.  Despite the fact that others will benefit, choose to do this for you.

In the spirit of Walking Together let’s lock arms and share our gifts and talents with the community.  I’m talking about community service.  Let’s join together a league of women whose indomitable energy can make a difference as we journey together.  Are you up for the challenge?